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But the website is giving me an error message, so I'll try posting is here and then move it once the forum problems get fixed.
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"Who was on the beis din?" my friend asked using the Ashkenazi pronunciation. I told him without hesitation, and I think I did a good job in not letting my expression or voice betray that his question dimmed my joy at telling him my news. But I wished he had not asked or that at least it had not been one of the first things for him to say after "Mazel tov". Maybe it's just me being overly sensitive because it bothers me that some people don't believe that I am Jewish. But it's still bothering me a day later, so I'm writing this post in the hope that putting down these thoughts will allow me to stop thinking about them. And I'm also hoping that my thoughts will stimulate some discussion and allow other JBC to think about this and enable them to decide ahead of time how they want to deal with similar situations.

Steve was not the first person to ask me the question, but he was the first one whose background gave me reason to think that he might really be questioning the validity of my conversion. The first person to ask me that question was a JTS ordained rabbi and member of my minyan. I'm sure she assumed that my conversion was Conservative and was simply curious to know which of her colleagues was involved. I took it as a variation on the game of "Jewish geography" in which Jews try to figure out how they are connected by way of friends, relatives, and Jewish places. When I mentioned who my sponsoring rabbi was, she noted approvingly that he is a "real mensch".

A couple other minyan friends who asked whom I studied with for conversion were probably more curious about whether it might have been one of the rabbis who are members of the minyan. In fact, although my sponsoring rabbi is not, one of the members of the beit din is indeed a minyan member. Whatever the case, my rabbi friend's reaction is pretty typical for people who know my sponsoring rabbi. I have never heard anyone ever say anything negative about him and people in the Conservative Jewish world have great respect for him. Not only was he formerly dean of the JTS rabbinical school, but he has handled well situations like a dying shul merging into his larger shul or my (secondary) lay-led minyan needing to change affiliations from his shul to another one. And he is a very kind and sensitive person who is hard not to like. I'm happy to have the "yichus" (lineage) of having a well-respected sponsoring rabbi.

But back to why Steve's question bothered me. Back when Steve was a member of my (primary) minyan, he self-identified as Orthodox. I think he even continued to maintain a membership in an Orthodox shul, while he was a member of our minyan. (He is not the only member to do so. One of our current members usually attends services of the Orthodox congregation that meets in the same building, and he is definitely Orthodox even though both his late wife and his second wife are Conservative---his son was recently ordained as a rabbi from YU!) Anyway, Steve's first wife was Orthodox and his children (now grown) went to Orthodox day schools. In fact, the way I told him that I had converted was that I said that I could no longer act as a "Shabbos goy" for him. This was a reference to the fact many years ago, as a non-Jew, I once did him the favor of turning off the alarm of a new oven which his wife discovered had the unfortunate "feature" that if left on for more than 12 hours, it would start beeping to alert the user.

So I couldn't help but wonder if Steve really wanted to know whether my conversion was Orthodox (i.e. "halachic") or not. But then I think to myself, that he knows enough about me to know how unlikely that is. He knows that I would never leave my minyan, which is fully Egalitarian and has no mechitza, and is thus "non-Orthodox". And I've heard that Orthodox rabbis typically would require a prospective convert civilly married to a Jew to separate from their spouse for the year of the conversion process. And my kids would probably have to re-convert Orthodox (more difficult for my daughter who is post-bat mitzvah age). So if he should know that it couldn't have been an Orthodox conversion, maybe he was only curious like my other minyan friends? He's not even currently Orthodoxly observant himself, having gone "secular" after his second marriage failed. And despite the Orthodox affiliation, he has alway believed in a Positive-Historical Judaism. I think that's why he used to be a member of my minyan: we enjoyed his "herectical" dvrei Torah---some of which were non-traditional even for our group---views that he could certainly never share with most Orthodox Jews.

It actually doesn't really bother me that some people don't believe that my conversion is "halachic". I have another Orthodox friend whom I specifically told upfront that I had converted with a Conservative beit din. She still hopes that in the future I'll convert Orthodox, but she still treats me as a Jew, although one without a reliable "hechsher"---I think she thinks of me as in the same category as any Jew with a questionable lineage.

Now I'm thinking that instead of hiding my discomfort with Steve's question, it would have been better to have just brought the issue right out into the open. Perhaps I should have said "The rabbis were Conservative, if that is what you were wondering." And then gone on to tell him who they were. That would have at least given him an indication of my worry that the validity of my conversion was being indirectly questioned. It would give him to opportunity to either tell me that's not why he asked, or even to talk directly about the issue as I did with my other Orthodox friend.

So what do other JBCs think about this? I suppose these days even Orthodox JBCs have people question the validity of their conversion and may ask about the beit din for that reason.

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Also if you have an iPod/iPhone/iTouch you can use iTunes

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I have another meeting with the Rabbi tomorrow afternoon and then Tuesday, my husband has his meeting.

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Thought I'd share, yet another, link I found with some great food info and specifically, thoughts on Pesach and overdoing the stress when it comes to prepping for Pesach.

http://www.israelikitchen.com/ and more specifically: http://www.israelikitchen.com/whats-cooking-for-shabbos-and-yom-tov/passover/thinking-about-passover-cooking/

Perhaps we need a "Foods, Recipes, and Cooking" forum :)