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Last week was the conclusion of a 3 week adult education course at my temple on Jewish prayer. In the last session one woman raised the question about how people can feel more connected to the service; the woman is not a regular attendee of Friday night or Saturday morning services, though she is there occasionally and on the High Holidays and may attend services while away for the winter elsewhere. My rabbi’s immediate response is that with time and with familiarity with the service and a sense of community the keva of the service can turn into kavanah. For the people who only attend services a few times a year they likely will not find the prayers meaningful and will feel frustrated. Frequently people who only come on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur can be hear complaining about a lack of connection to the prayers and to the style of service. But if you have a good sense of what is going on the rest of the year you can appreciate the changes and the differences that happen during the Days of Awe.

Another rabbi friend of mine and I were discussing kavanah once and he asked me what I do when I don’t feel like praying. My response at the time was that I just don’t come to services; I didn’t understand why you should say a prayer if you don’t either a) believe it, b) understand it, or c) find it meaningful. I haven’t come completely full circle on this over the years, but I do understand the value in saying prayers even when you are not fully appreciative of what you are saying. On the nights I don’t feel connected to the words I am saying I still feel connected to God and to my community and am able to think about why I’m not finding something meaningful or what exactly is blocking my energy. And on the days when I am overwhelmed with spirituality and meaningfulness, that is when my comfort and familiarity with the words and order—the keva—that’s when my prayers are taken to the next level. There have been many times when I’ll notice a phrase, a word, or understand the Hebrew for the first time, and if I didn’t enter this prayer space each week and make an effort to connect to through the structure I wouldn’t have that opportunity.

In Everyman’s Talmud Abraham Cohen writes that “although the rabbis commanded the art of participating in the three daily statutory services, they were careful to demand that such devotions must not be allowed to degenerate into a mechanical and perfunctory performance.” This is an idea that I completely agree with but I think that people could view it as antithetical to the idea that kavanah follows keva; it could easily be said that saying things by rote in a service is only accessing the structure. But, I believe that you can appreciate the beauty of keva and still say the prayers with intention. I don’t believe that keva and intention are mutually exclusive and that if you connect to the structure and make yourself open to the possibility of kavanah, then your intention and your prayer is anything but mechanical. Perhaps you cannot always access that kavanah, but you give yourself that opportunity each time you enter into the Jewish prayer structure.

In the midst of all of this I began to think about the Friday Night Live phenomenon. I believe that it has been both a blessing and a curse to modern Judaism, and to Reform Judaism in particular. It is giving younger and/or disaffected Jews and entry point into the synagogue, but at the same time it is teaching them that this style of service and music are the only ways to truly have kavanah. When that style of service is not offered I think many people can feel disjointed, lost, or disconnected. But, how do you get them to commit to regular attendance without this enticement? (And when does the enticement become a gimmick and a show and stray from a true prayer community?) My rabbi brought up something during the class and during a conversation I had with him earlier in the week about how an individual’s attendance and commitment to the temple is good not only for just them but for the community at large–the energy I bring is good (or bad) for the people around me and vice versa. I think many people in modern Judaism are looking at their religious experience to be spiritually satisfying on an individual and personal level only. In Reform Judaism we value the idea of personal autonomy, but when it comes to building a community this can perhaps be taken too far. When you step into a synagogue you are no longer in an individual religious sphere–here your choices to attend and to try to connect to the prayers are part of a community and individual effort.

(cross-posted to my own blog)